new blogggg

haven't blogged in a while.. sad. anyway, i've been driving more. well ish, last week i was out 5/7 days and took the car out. legit! this week i got grounded bleh. oh well. things have been going okay. finished half of my stats packet. saving up money to buy david's present. i already have something in mind, i just gotta get to the mall.

ahhhh i really wanna watch thisss:



it looks so damn cuteee (:

anyway, i heard invisible monsters might be made into a movie? starring jessica biel. idk how the format of the movie will work, considering the way the book is written, but i hope it'll be good, if it does come out as a movie.


hmm i dont really have a good structured thought system for this blog entry. i've been listening to old skool hiphop alot. lots of tribe, getting into de la soul and the roots. gotta get some B.I.G. shit soon. ehhh.

this sunday, david and his fam invited me to his bday dinner at maggiano's at tysons 2! i've never been there. i'm excited. im looking forward to the good food and good company. i like his rents and sis alot, they're mad nice people. i have to make him a card and get him my gift soon.

dude shit i think im getting fucking cellphone elbow. and blackberry thumb. fuck!

exhilarated!

i drove for the first time by myself on the 4th of july, which now looks to be horribly dangerous and slightly irresponsible. i don't like driving because i don't want to die but it feels good playing songs and having a friend tell you where to go when you're about to get lost. the long and short of my saturday/sunday was picked up kristie, went to evelyn, chilled, fireworks, thanh & pat met up at ev's, then we went to kristie's to chill on the roof, dumb fuckery ensued such as not sleeping until 6am but in turn getting to see the sunrise, and then i went home at 830. yeah i dont feel like dishing out the details. im hungry. i smell bacon!

check my new kicks

went to ny this weekend and shopped like a manie.

 from ae.

also picked up a pair of light grey shorts and a dark grey, asphalt like, sweater vest from jcrew, a blue pullover hoodie from h&m, and a pair of grey sweats from aerie. i <3>

in other news..... HARRY POTTER COMES OUT in 22 DAYS!!!!!!!! if im not here for july 15, i'll fucking punch a dead horse

the singular faces of me

photobooth whore yikes

13 days

of school remains! then the grueling task of hunting for colleges, how to get in, how to pay, what to do, and all that jazz begins. i kind of want to cop out and go to some shit-for-brains liberal arts school like bard or bennington because SATs/ACTs aren't required, i don't need an above 4.0 GPA to get into some better-than-thou state uni or private college, but i will have to be an excessive amount to come to school dressed for hipster success while not really learning anything structured. i have to take at least 2 different SAT subject tests in order to be ever considered to UCSB or UCSD, and i have to retake the SAT at least once or perhaps twice more. if all else fails, i should have GMU or VCU to fall back on.

i'm pretty terrified that i won't be able to get into a college of my choice because i don't have a 4.2 GPA, an above 2000 on the SAT, i haven't taken SAT II's or the ACT, i'm not a particularly outstanding student although i think i'd be able to get some solid teacher recommendations. my extracurriculars are rather lacking in variety and depth; i'm in 3 specific honor societies (science, english, and french), i do debate part-time, scholastic bowl but we always lose, but i'm gonna join the offish NHS next year and model UN. but honestly all i'm concerned about right now is having enough money my senior year to go on a summer roadtrip of sorts to cali. i'm foolish about my future because i used to believe i'd be a perfect student: perfect grades, perfect scores, perfect personality. but i'm so horribly flawed that i don't think any college would want me, except for NVCC. bummer.

alas its pretty nice out so i think i'll finish the chapter of harry potter book 5 i'm on and take a walk in my new newbie 578s

I LOVE THIS CEREAL!!!

i'm gettting really tired

i really want a softcover moleskine notebook


I'm getting exhausted. i want to cry. my spirits are tanking while my blood pressure is rising. i don't even know what i'm doing anymore or why i feel the way i feel. i'm tired of all the petty drama going around, and my seemingly endless patience. i don't know why i'm putting up with things the way i am. i'm getting scared that if i continue this... i'll put up with stupid bull shit when i'm older, when it comes to friendships and relationships. i want to be able to back my word up but i don't think i'll have the strength to.

there is something in my heart that is eating away at me.. but i have no idea what it is.