SEN10RS LOL

HOT DAMNNNNN today oh today. First day of senior year. I drove to school, definitely woke up MAD late. My dad walked in at 622 and was like, "Hey you have school today..." It took a second for everything to sink in, then I rushed like a fucking mad man. Showered and got dressed in 5 minutes. A sandwich was so kindly made by my dad, which I ate for my breakfast. I was out the door by 638, which was when i should have been near the school. I got there in 10 minutes, which was surprising cause I thought I was gonna be late what with the traffic and excess of cars. Traffic pattern at school was alright, and parking was good. There were 2 accidents that I knew of today, one before and one after school. So damn ridiculous, I am NOT driving to school ever. The rampancy of aggressive asshole teen drivers and general dicks on 15 is NOT worth losing driving privs over, just cause I wanna drive to school. I did my makeup at school lol, my hair was shit, and I was so stressed lol. I saw my boy Tay Waldronnnnn, what a honey. Just kidding, I was so ready to walk up to him and punch him in the face... Idk why I'm so aggressive lol. Hmm, breakdown of my first day:

1- AP Lit: Dominic, Meadhbh, and Kalvin are in the class, friend-wise. I'm gonna try to make new friends in the class, the people are alright.
2- Physics: Mariam's in the class, so thank god for that. Carly, Bo, Jimmy Long, and Grace the special ed kid are too.. Carly is annoying as fuck.. Grace talks too much but thats excusable, Bo is already becoming the teacher's pet lol.
4- Chem II: My fave class so far! Kristie, Dominic, Casey his girlfrann, Anand, Rebecca, Delante lol, and Alex Carroll. Renberg is fucking hilarious and really upbeat. I'm gonna try and get a good teacher rec from her
LUNCH: I have the first lunch of the day and its packeddd with people I know. Kristie, Evelyn, Robert, Connor, Cheang, this new girl kristie met, Kristen Healy, Dom & Casey, Rebecca.. I feel like I'm missing some people
6- AP Stats: Danielle, Keith, and Mary Zheng. Legit class, looks manageable enough, and the workload doesn't seem too bad. Hadkdjksig, however you spell/say her damn last name, is chill. Seems like a good teacher.

Tomorrow my classes are AP Lit, ART HISTORY!!!, AP Gov w/ Jernigan (fuck), and Finance with Matt Ntiros. Should be alright.. I've got lunch w/ Philo tomorrow so that should be ok. The only thing I'm really worried about is not finding anyone to chill with in the mornings since most everyone drives now, they get to school whenever they feel like it. I, on the otherhand, have to take the bus, and I have no clue when the bus is gonna get to school. I know I get home at 3 fucking o'clock when I take the bus home. Sucks so hard.. I need to cop rides bad haha.

Anyway.. senior year. I'm not trying to expect too much from it, like I did soph year. I'm just gonna do the work and get things over with. I'm def not gonna be dumb and stay afterschool for no reason, and I'm not gonna skip my clubs and shit anymore. Monday-Thurs afterschool is for homework, clubs, and whatever else school-wise I have to do. Friday & Saturday are gonna be the only days I go out and do shit. Work hard, play hard. No more dilly-dally shit, I need to lock down my senior year. My goals are summa cum laude, no finals, passing AP scores but I really don't give a shit either way, B or higher in all classes, sleep before midnight, and NO SLEEPING IN CLASS. I really want to do well this year, and after the failure of last year's study habits and test scores, I'm not letting myself slip into an apathetic stupor. Sadly, I signed up for the SAT in October. I said I wasn't gonna bother taking it again, but I need to send the scores to schools I'm actually gonna apply to, and I just thought, what the hell just take the damn test again. If nothing changes, then that's the way it is and I'm not gonna fret over it. The main schools I'm trying to get into are:

-Bard College
-Cal State Long Beach
-VCU
-maybe VT, GMU, and/or some other local school.

I'm really trying to be realistic with my college goals; I'm not gonna apply to a place where I know I have no chance of getting into. There's no point in wasting my money or time, just to see if I can get in or not. This year is so serious; I know some people are like fuck it SEN10R STATUS FUCK THE FRESHMENNN, but this is our last year to make an impression for colleges. Blah all this college talk makes me tired. I'll leave you with this.

i do the figure 8's so concisely

wow its 330 am and im still awake. seriously? yes. im chillin to the tribe, lights off, eyes burning. back to school in a week and i can't be more excited. i need to get out of the house and away from my rents, but we all know how that is. going to cali fri-sun next week, so i got that to look forward to. other than that, my summer's dead. went to dream on friday with david, kristie, evelyn, and her 2 friends. that was chill. then we went back to kristie a little past midnight and chilled in her sketch basement. i am not a fan of hookah, i can say that much. i'd rather smoke regular cigarettes cause at least i know how much i'm doing. the second hand smoke sucked. but david was a damn pro, like a dragon version of a jimmy guidici champ lol. anyway...


applying to colleges! well not really, but i'm really narrowing down my choices.
1. Bard College; annandale on hudson, ny
2. Wesleyan University; middletown, ct
3. UChicago and/or UWashington.. i havent decided yet if i wanna apply
4. Cal State Long Beach!
5. VCU

bard is my drea/. i think i've said that alot already but i really mean it this time. green acres, new people, new place. 5 hours away from rochester lol, so i can still visit my girl kduong. im just really ready to go to new places, no matter where i go to school. college is what you make it, right? so im ready to make it cooltastic. its late, fuck off.

anyway, every year, friends seem to weed themselves in and out of my life. kinda sucks. but its ok. good to know my forever friends now instead of later. i guess you could say a lot of this is my fault.. and it is. i wont deny that. but how much time will i spend trying to make something work that won't? not that much time, i'll tell you that, if there's not much give. i'm psyched about senior year and the typical shit that goes with it. football games, prom. new friends, old friends. court yarddd and pranks (as if). oh and toga time. its gonna suck to say goodbye to everyone, and i mean everyone. even the people i didn't like all the much or talk to; they made my year what it is. its gonna suck to not be 5 minutes from everyone i love. we'll all be going our separate ways... some staying here in VA, i hope to go to NY, david going off to GA if all works out for him. i guess this is the time to live it all up.

looking back now, i can't really gauge if what i've done will yield the results i want, or if it was worth all the shit i put up with. maybe it was. i think i learned something? but what i do know right now is that i'm hungry as fuck and im craving qdoba nachos

13 days

of school remains! then the grueling task of hunting for colleges, how to get in, how to pay, what to do, and all that jazz begins. i kind of want to cop out and go to some shit-for-brains liberal arts school like bard or bennington because SATs/ACTs aren't required, i don't need an above 4.0 GPA to get into some better-than-thou state uni or private college, but i will have to be an excessive amount to come to school dressed for hipster success while not really learning anything structured. i have to take at least 2 different SAT subject tests in order to be ever considered to UCSB or UCSD, and i have to retake the SAT at least once or perhaps twice more. if all else fails, i should have GMU or VCU to fall back on.

i'm pretty terrified that i won't be able to get into a college of my choice because i don't have a 4.2 GPA, an above 2000 on the SAT, i haven't taken SAT II's or the ACT, i'm not a particularly outstanding student although i think i'd be able to get some solid teacher recommendations. my extracurriculars are rather lacking in variety and depth; i'm in 3 specific honor societies (science, english, and french), i do debate part-time, scholastic bowl but we always lose, but i'm gonna join the offish NHS next year and model UN. but honestly all i'm concerned about right now is having enough money my senior year to go on a summer roadtrip of sorts to cali. i'm foolish about my future because i used to believe i'd be a perfect student: perfect grades, perfect scores, perfect personality. but i'm so horribly flawed that i don't think any college would want me, except for NVCC. bummer.

alas its pretty nice out so i think i'll finish the chapter of harry potter book 5 i'm on and take a walk in my new newbie 578s

girl what you drinkin?

TODAY WAS A BEAUTIFUL DAY, PERFECT SHORTS/SKIRT WEATHER AND GUESS WHAT?!?! I GOT MY FUCKING PERIOD! Who are my ovaries tryna get big with? Shit.

I'm really enjoying class with T. Sitting right across from him in class gives me the perfect opportunity to just watch him and be a goddamn creep. I definitely ran into both Taylors in the stairwell today but I was totally friendly; shit i even said hi! They just kind of stumbled and I think one of them said "oh shit". This whole thing has also made me want to destroy my high school reputation. ALL THESE BITCHES CAN KISS MY ASS TIL THEIR LIPS BLEED!

Only 3 weeks and 2 days until I am ungrounded (hopefully)!! Oh and the fact that my rents finally are letting me get rides from student drivers is ballin. I love being in the car, blastin that hoodrat shit with the windows down, being a TEENAGER. It feels good. It's what I've always looked forward to, as sad as that sounds :\

Oh damn, V-Day on Saturday. Another V-DAY ALONE. And grounded. What the tits. SIKE I don't give a shit, the single life is where it is at, NIGGA. Do what you want, no restrictions, no boundaries, no one to answer or explain shit to. YEAAAH

Things are lookin up, they really are. I just hope it keeps up. I'm just ready for the summer time; out and about, poolin around, ray-bans, dark tans, rainbow flipflops, and wack ass booty shorts is where that shit is AT. oh so excited. then senior year: hello second semester! I think i might just go to GMU or VCU, maybe UVA if I like it. I'm definitely staying in-state and saving the prestigious shit for grad school; wait for me JHU, for you are the only one who has my heart.

ANYWAY It's time for me to blame it on the alcohol aka homework

he's gotta meet me some time if i'm gonna be his son-in-law

let me begin my saturday with lies. that's what they always consist of anyway. at around 3, i go over to ashleigh's and shortly after, darbus showed up. we sit around for 2 hours, waiting for taylor to get his ass over. well unsurprisingly, he's at the gym, so we go over to his house to meet up with him. his dad lets us in. he briefly forgets who i was. then he asks me how california was. it was just kind of surprising that taylor told his parents where i went over winter break. anyway anyway anyway, there are a gaggle of girls, his sister, kristen, and her friends, just walking around the house in dresses. it's kristen's 14th birthday party and there are to be like, 50+ people over in the house. taylor is walking around without a shirt on while several budding teenage girls still in middle school are walking about. you know they were checking him out. you fuckin know it. uh... we three kings make our way up to his room. he's still getting dressed, my god he takes a century. it's past 5pm now. it took us 2 fucking hours to get out and finally do something. we get into taylor's car and we go to eat at some pizza place. no wonder the fucker never eats lunch when i'm around, he's a messy ass eater. um um um... by 6 30, we bounce out, go to taylor's house to get darb's car and we go to ashleigh's house. we watch American History X... for the most part. then ashleigh puts in another movie that nobody watches. at 9 45, my dad picks me up. the entire time, my parents believed i was studying. oh and then we stopped, had dinner, and watched a movie. i think it was implied that taylor was over since my mom figured out that darbus was there too. it was a good night. we didn't do much of anything but i think that that's what made it so great. i almost fell asleep in taylor's arms because i was so goddamn tired. SO CUTE OH MY GOD!!! haha fuck that shit!

i don't know if that D+ i had in lecture will get bumped up to at least a C. i can only hope. i already feel like shit over the C i'll have in math and the B's i'm pulling in my bullshit classes. i've never been in trouble over my grades.

and well, here's a picture from last night.



me: "oh my god i'm like doing normal teenager things like going out with friends in their cars and such!!"
taylor: "who the hell is this crazy bitch swear to god..."